Sorrow's Memories
by Reaper Of Sorrows
Summary: Corporal John Sorrow's squad went missing after their temporary resting spot got assaulted. He's off to find them. However, things won't go as he expected. Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to the Resistance: Fall of man
1. Prologue

Sorrow's Memories

John Sorrow's Field Log, 15th of July, 1951

(Flashback)

I was assigned to command a four- man patrol. There was Carter, Ramirez and Walker besides me. When our temporary resting spot got assaulted, we managed to defeat the attackers but after the dust cleared I only found myself leaning against wall and trying to clean my wounds. It was shocking to see that I was only one to be found when reinforcements arrived. After they picked me up and headed back to their military camp, they began questioning me about my team and where they might be. My answer was simple:

"They weren't there. Every time something like this happens, we regroup to our medical quarters and if someone is missing, we're pretty sure they have been captured."

After I gave them everything I know about the situation, they wanted to know who attacked us. "I'm not sure but I think I saw at least five hybrids and one stalker", I said. "What puzzles me the most is that the Stalker, that found our base after I lost my squad, left me alive. It could've easily just killed me and left my body to rot but it didn't"

When I got permission to leave, I just went back to my personal quarters. Everyone who saw me that day could easily see that I was filled with anger, depression and sorrow. Nobody came to ask me if anything is wrong or stuff like that but afterwards I wish that someone would've bothered to ask me how I'm feeling.

(End of Flashback)

It's been three months since I last heard from them. Everyone around me is celebrating our victory in London. I'd like to celebrate as much as other people in our camp but constant concerns about my missing patrol stops me for doing so. I've tried to get information from my superiors and other patrols that have passed by but all I managed to claw out of them was a message. It said:

"When you look inside yourself and you feel hollow, your mind and spirit both are trying to find the Kingdom of Sorrow to rest their bad memories. But if you let Reaper crawl inside your mind, you may be too late and your spirit descends to madness"

I realized immediately who wrote that message. I requested permission to go search my squad. What I didn't expect them to do was that they let me go alone. Usually when someone request permission to go find their missing teammates, they aren't allowed to go alone. Apparently I was different or there was something they didn't want me to know. Without huge delays I packed my gear and MREs, waved everyone goodbyes and left the camp trying to find the answers I was looking for.

To Be Continued…

This is my first fic. I decided to see what I can do so don't expect it to be flawless.

Read and review if you want to do so. I update the story as soon as I'm able to


	2. Restless Nights

Chapter 2: Restless Nights

I left our main military base about a month ago. After that I decided to scavenge nearby old ruins for possible supplies and ammunition. I only found two full clips in his carbine, four tomato soup portions and three bottles full of brown water. Then I came across a creature that looked like an oversized dog. I was ready to pull out my carbine and shoot it but then noticed a small hybrid patrol approaching me. For some reason, I was never spotted by the patrol.

After getting out of their sight, I found a place where I could rest. It became harder and harder to fight against exhaustion. I made sure that the place was secure and tried to get some rest. However, my constant nightmares I had before leaving the base came back but now they were much worse.

When I woke up, I saw a figure approaching me. From a distance, it looked like a British soldier. I grabbed my rifle and went closer to see it properly. It indeed was a British soldier. His name was Carter, to be precise. So that meant I finally found one of my lost squad members. Once I got him to safety I noticed something horrifying: he was infected. At that point it made me feel guilty. Not only because he was a fiercely loyal soldier and good friend to have at your side but also because he was under my command and my job was to make sure that they come back home alive.

But I didn't have time to worry about my guilt. I had to be strong and keep going so that I have better chances to find the rest of my team. So I gave Carter an order to inform me if there was any changes in his state of health. He simply nodded and we pressed ahead. Before we hit Manchester, Carter asked me to stop and requested permission to speak. Even if we were good friends and all that, he never interrupted me because of my position in military ranks was higher than his. I appreciated it but sometimes wished he would just forget our military rankings whenever he needed to talk to me. As much as I hated it, I reminded him that whenever he had something worrying him he could speak to me without "military presence". He nodded and opened up to me:

"When I'm close to turn one of them, are you willing to execute me? I would do it myself before I'm close enough but unfortunately, I'm too weak to do it." I couldn't anything reasonable to say so I asked him: "Why you are asking me that? You know that it's your decision." He didn't say anything for a while. I could see from his face that he wasn't taking it very well so I decided to stop for a moment and get this matter dealt with.

"What is it exactly? I want to know if it is anything bad and see if I'm able to help with it." He began speaking but I could hear his voice breaking. "What are you going to say to the rest of our team if I'm gone before you manage to find him?" I haven't thought that yet so I couldn't give him a simple answer. "All I can say is that IF I find them. I'm not so sure anymore after I dodged all those Chimera patrols before I found you. Their defenses have become much tougher since I left my first resting shelter." I was about to continue my sentence when he interrupted me. "You shouldn't doubt yourself. You have proven your worth to us many times before. Yes, we've had close calls before but we made it thanks to your leadership so why would it be different now? To be honest, our superiors think that we don't deserve to be under your command but as you have shown, they were wrong, right?" As much as I hated to question our superiors' consideration, they were wrong indeed. These guys have been the most loyal soldiers I have ever served with and that way earned my respect.

Things took turn when I heard Carter asking: "So, how you've been holding up?" Before that night, he's voice never sounded so concerned when he asked me that. "It's been really rough for these few days before I found you. I had to put up a brave face with believe that I would find you all and bring home alive but we know that's not going to happen because of our current situation so that's yet another promise I failed to keep. It never hurt this much to reveal my flaws as your leader." You know, I once made a request to promote you but they denied it. They didn't think you were ready to be squad leader material but they didn't see what I saw in you. If it were up to me, you would be leader of our squad."

As the sun came down, we found an abandoned outpost. From the outside, it looked it's been scavenged recently. We weren't wrong. The whole place was filled with our fallen teammates and enemies. It took a while to get front door cleared but it was worth it. The bunker still had some supplies and few intact ammo crates but all beds were destroyed. We took what we needed and were about to walk away when we noticed one hybrid corpse that had very familiar dog tags hanging on its teeth. I took a closer look on them and noticed that they were Walker's tags. Apparently, he found this place before we did but it was strange that he didn't left any traces behind him. I took the tags, regrouped with Carter and headed towards our camp.

Once we reached our camp, I set up a campfire and gave Carter a hand on setting up our tents. He sounded grateful but when I looked to him I saw that same expression on his face that was filled with mixture of sadness and anger. He started to look worrying. He never looked so worrying under my command. I pulled him away for a minute and asked: "Are you still thinking that conversation we had earlier?" I was surprised by his answer: "It's not that", he said. "It's just these flashbacks I keep having." I didn't say anything until I noticed he stopped working.

"About what?" I asked him. "About my military career before I was assigned to your squad. It didn't go as I imagined. At first, I didn't have any problems until our first operation. We were on escort mission to get a tiny settlement to safety before incoming stalker attack. I volunteered to set up a distraction so that the rest of us can escort civilians to safety. My plan for distraction went straight to hell. I managed to get stalkers' attention but they were much powerful than those we have encountered before. They surrounded me but none of them fired at me. They looked like they were waiting for something or someone. Unfortunately, I was right when I heard someone commanding: "Stand down!" Stalkers stepped aside and a figure walked in front of me. I recognized that face immediately. He was my former commander. He ordered stalkers to form a circle around me, probably because I wouldn't be able to escape. Then I heard him asking: "Tell me Carter, why did you and your friends believe you could get these people to safety, further from the Chimera. You know that there is no escape. Chimera is everywhere and it's only a matter of time before we all be brothers with them". "Why? Carter asked him." Only answer I managed to get was: "To show you and the whole world that we shouldn't resist them." Then he pulled out his syringe and injected me with something. After that I passed out and they took me to their outpost.

Next thing I remember is going through an immersive amount of pain. It was so strong but after it was over I got dragged to a testing range where they shot me with all kinds of infantry weapons they had. First, they used our Carbines, Rossmores and Fareyes. I was surprised when I saw the results. None of them could cause any damage to me. When they heard alarm go off I saw my chance to escape. I got myself out of there and you know the rest.


End file.
